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Here's the reason elastic waistbands were invented

I started a diet on Monday. And, as usual, temptation is around every corner. That's natural when you're trying to lose weight, of course. Food is at the front of your mind, so you tend to subconsciously seek out all those things you're trying to cut back on.



But this week was ridiculous. This is the week everyone I know sent me a link something that has been lovingly declared the Hamburger Fatty Melt. That's a hamburger patty with two grilled cheese sandwiches as its bun.



Yes. Two grilled cheese sandwiches as its bun. This horrifies a lot of people. It makes other people weak in the knees. My reaction was a little of both. I'd take a little bite, I'm not gonna lie. But, it's not something that's going to go in my lunch box everyday. The Fatty Melt is one of those Foods of Legend that are meant to be enjoyed perhaps only once in a lifetime and only by the bravest of gourmands.



The Fatty Melt joins the ranks of the legendary Luther Burger, a bacon cheeseburger sandwiched between two donuts. It's named after Luther Vandross and is known to be a leading cause of The Itis. Then there's Elvis' favorite, the Fool's Gold Loaf. This one is a hollowed out loaf of bread filled with one entire jar of peanut butter, one entire jar of grape jelly, and one pound of bacon, all baked til it's golden brown.



If you're not up to the Fool's Gold Loaf (or if you just don't have a private jet to take to Colorado in the middle of the night), there are smaller challenges to tackle as you work your way up. There's the Philly Taco, a cheesesteak wrapped in a slice of cheese pizza. Or maybe you can grab a couple (or 20) friends and tackle something like the In-and-Out 100x100 burger. And with Thanksgiving fast approaching, consider a turducken as this year's centerpiece.



Just remember, all things in moderation and make sure your gym membership is paid up. As for me, I think I'll just have a salad for now.

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