BLOG | Throwing Shade
Posted by JUSTIN MITCHELL on July 5, 2015
It all starts about two weeks before Independence Day weekend.
First, you get a notification that you've been added to a private group on Facebook. Then, the photos from last year's occasion starts flooding the page. Red, white and blue attire, sweaty headbands and more selfies that you didn't remember taking start popping up on your newsfeed.
The first step in getting ready for Crab Fest is the Thursday evening cocktail party, but no Cosmopolitans are included. Instead, you trade in fancy drinks for gallons of cocktail sauce to pour into small containers to serve with the weekend's boiled shrimp plates. If you're lucky, you don't spill any on yourself. Most aren't so lucky.
Posted by JUSTIN MITCHELL on June 30, 2015
Our society expects women to be well-groomed and well-manicured at all times.
Posted by JUSTIN MITCHELL on June 23, 2015
The Civil War was 150 years ago, and it's a part of our nation's history, but is that where it belongs? I may get nasty looks for dressing up like a toy cowboy, but is wearing a flag some consider offensive any better?
Posted by JUSTIN MITCHELL on June 22, 2015
I don't know about you, but it's always a tough decision on whether to bring my loaded shotgun into the doughnut shop with me.
Posted by JUSTIN MITCHELL on June 16, 2015
I was excelling during workouts, but I couldn't give up food. I can barely boil and egg, and there have been times when I almost caught my apartment on fire trying to microwave a Hot Pocket. I've never been one to cook meals or eat leftovers, so I relied on fast food and restaurants to feed my eating habits.
Posted by JUSTIN MITCHELL on May 26, 2015
The best/most tragic part of the "bringing a whole new meaning to casual Friday" top are the deep pockets that resemble cargo shorts. It's only a shame that people won't be able to store their feelings about the shirt in the pockets, or their set of encyclopedias and CD player, fully equipped with a mix of Taking Back Sunday and Avril Lavigne.
Posted by JUSTIN MITCHELL on May 19, 2015
My birthday is in July, and all I want is a more fit 'Dad Bod.' No bread. No artifical sweeteners. No chemicals. Meat, fruits, veggies, nuts and almond butter are my new diet. My saving grace since I can't have diet soda is unsweet tea. The drive-through cashiers have had serious questions about my drink choice.